Bumble BFF? Bumble BFF!

Okay, so I think after spending a bit of time on this app, and having friends chide that I should be the poster girl for this app, it would only be write for me to write something about this app.

Now how did we get here? A couple of years ago I decided to join a pyramid scheme, AKA start a PhD program and as it would have it, I had to pack my life into 2 bags 23kgs each to another city, Shanghai. I had been living abroad for a little while and had established some pretty decent relationships, but see, I had to leave them all behind for a title, you know. Now here’s the licker, it was all fun and games until I realised I had spent a lot of time talking with myself, and I talk a lot. I tried to join my usual social clubs, like Rotary, which is always a great idea to connect with people doing things. But at some point i started to crave a girl group and honestly, it’s alot more difficult to go into the wild on your own. I’m sure there had to be some kind of dating app, but for friends. And there was!!

Image from Bumble

I started using Bumble bff for a little bit. It felt a little awkward but i did need some friends. I met a few girls but we weren’t great fits, I guess I had never considered things like age differences and also interests. The same way you operate on the dating platform, you’ve gotta do the same for the bff platform as well, you know, Cinderella finding the shoe that fits. I eventually got the hang of it and met some like minded girls. Out of this I ended up forging some pretty good relationships that I still have upto now. Time moved on fast and I had to move to another city. This was a little different now, because I was a little older, different interests and so forth. And also, this change i experienced in this new city, so many activities but it was so hard to go to stuff on my own. It wasnt even about getting out of your comfort zone, but alot of places just seemed to have people coming paired up. This even includes some networking events. I did find a few that I met nice people but it felt hard. So the app it was

I was intentional about the friendships I wanted to make, and as it would have it, I did get some really good friendships out of this. But it’s not that easy. I learnt a few things during this Bumble BFF expedition and I am here with some unsolicited advice!

Make a profile babes

I think we kinda get a glimpse into your life or personality when you actually write something on your profile. Where are you from? What are you looking for here? What do you like? Do you want to join me for a meal? It makes it a lot easier to attract the girlfriends you are actually looking for. A magnetic profile is like catnip for the pals you're actually looking to vibe with.

Be open-minded

BFF hunting is your ticket to a cultural carnival – different countries, diverse backgrounds, and views are as wild as a rollercoaster. You'll learn more than you did in your last Netflix binge. Over time, I personally have made many friends from different places, and if I’m being honest, it has opened my mind so much and given me a better perspective on different situations.

We do not want to date you, we just want to be friends

I think a few of my friends and I have shared this sentiment. Meeting on an app is awkward enough as it already is. Writing the first message can be nerve-wracking but you can’t get anywhere until you try. Now, once we have reached out, make an effort to reach out back, and have a chat that actually feels like a conversation. Let's make it a real chat, and don't be shy to suggest a caffeine conspiracy or a liquid courage rendezvous.

No flaky pastries

There isn’t much that can be elaborated on this. If we commit to a meeting, at least come through. And if you can’t make it, it’s okay, just let the next person know, and possibly arrange to reschedule. Things happen and we understand.

Be on time

Maybe this is a me thing. But honestly, I think being on time for stuff shows you value the next person’s time. This doesn’t only apply to bff dates, but just in general. Being on time is just, nice, you know.

Not every glass slipper is a fit, and it’s okay

I think this one sometimes is a bummer. You both put in effort but it’s not a match. But that’s okay Cinderella, that shoe was not for you, and you will meet someone who you might vibe with and get a great friendship out of it.

Flaunt that Fab Personality

Don't shy away from injecting your personality into conversations and interactions. Whether you have a quirky sense of humour, a passion for specific hobbies, or unique life experiences, allowing your true self to shine through makes you more memorable and relatable. Your personality is a key factor in attracting friends who resonate with you, so embrace your individuality and let it be a guiding force in your interactions.

This is not a comprehensive list of my unsolicited advice but you get the point!